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Adoption · Attachment · Repair

Your story isn't broken. It's becoming.

I'm Jessie — adoptee, adoptive and bio mom of 4 young adults, coach, and creator writing and speaking about adoption reform and attachment theory. I help adoptees, adoptive & foster parents, and the professionals who support them understand what trauma-informed healing actually looks like.

Illustrated hummingbird and lioness intertwined, symbolizing gentleness and strength
Illustrated feather in warm terracotta and gold ink
Who Is Jessie Elliott?

Gentle as a hummingbird. Brave as a lioness.

I've spent years living on both sides of the adoption story — as an adoptee, as an adoptive and bio mom of 4 young adults, as a student of attachment theory, and now as a coach and content creator working toward my PhD-C in Developmental Psychology. I write and post about the parts of adoption and foster care that don't make it into the "gotcha day" videos: grief, identity, hypervigilance, and what it actually takes to build a secure attachment after rupture.

My work blends academic research with the lived experience of the people it's actually about. No clinical distance, no easy bows on hard stories — just honest, trauma-informed language for adoptees, the parents raising them, and the professionals supporting both.

I hold a combination of vantage points I haven't found matched anywhere else: adopted internationally as an older child (not an infant), and I've raised 4 kids to adulthood — one adopted from infancy, three biological, all raised together under one roof. Add 30 years in brand strategy and marketing, plus doctoral-level research in human development on top of it, and that's the lens everything I teach comes through.

“I've never met another voice doing this work from that exact vantage point — backed by doctoral research and three decades in brand strategy. That's not a brag. It's just where I stand, and it's why I see things others miss.”
Adoptee & attachment researcher Adoptive & bio mom of 4 Trauma-informed coach Content creator, 100K+ reach PhD-C — Developmental Psychology
The Part No One Talks About

Let's name it.

An overwhelming number of adoptees have survived sexual abuse, and abuse of every kind — both before they were adopted and within their adoptive families afterward. Not as a rare exception, but as a pattern this field has stayed too quiet about. I'm one of them. And right now, we are in the middle of a suicide epidemic among adoptees that isn't being talked about nearly enough.

International adoptees face up to 4.5x the risk of a suicide attempt, and 3.6x the risk of suicide death, compared to non-adopted peers — with domestic adoptees also significantly elevated (Hjern et al., Swedish national cohort study). Sexual abuse shows up on both sides of the adoption line: preadoptive abuse predicts distinct, often more severe trauma trajectories later in life (Child Abuse & Neglect journal), and researchers who've listened directly to adults abused within their adoptive families call it a "major silence" the field still hasn't reckoned with (Goldsmiths, University of London). This isn't a footnote — it's part of the truth I carry, too.

This isn't content I make for shock value. It's the reason I do this work — so adoptees don't have to carry this alone, and so parents and professionals stop mistaking survival behaviors for defiance.

If you're struggling right now, please reach out: Call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, available 24/7 in the US.
Ready To:

Work with me

For Everyone — Start Here

Discovery Call

Not sure which path fits? Let's talk it through together — no pressure, no obligation, just a real conversation about where you're starting from.

$1 booking fee to confirm your spot.

Book a Discovery Call
For Adoptees

1:1 Coaching & Support

A trauma-informed space to process your adoption story, understand your attachment patterns, and build a life that isn't run by your nervous system's old survival rules.

Book a Session
For Professionals

Speaking & Consulting

Workshops, trainings, and talks on adoption-competent, trauma-informed care for agencies, clinicians, and organizations who want to do this work better.

$500 booking fee to reserve this call (up to 2 hours) — fully credited toward your final contract.

Bring Me In
For Anyone in It Right Now

Crisis Navigation Session

When high emotions get triggered in a specific situation, this is the space for an educated, unbiased perspective — grounded in both scientific evidence and lived experience. Book one session or come back as often as you need; it's built for real life, not a script.

Book a Session
Wear It Loud

Shop the collection

The lion and the hummingbird, made wearable. Fierce, protective love circling gentle resilience — for adoptees, adoptive & foster parents, and everyone doing the work of repair.

Available Now

Embroidered Dad Hat

The HummingbirdLion emblem, embroidered in gold on a classic black dad hat.

Shop the Hat
Coming Soon

Graphic Tee

The full-color emblem on a soft, everyday tee.

Visit the Shop
Coming Soon

Hoodie

Cozy enough for the hard days, bold enough to say it out loud.

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Coming Soon

Coffee Mug

A little fierce-and-gentle energy for your morning routine.

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Coming Soon

Reflection Journal

A place to write the parts of the story that don't fit in a caption.

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Read It Slow

Books & resources

Words for the parts of this work that a caption can't hold — the memoir, the guide for parents, and a free companion for adoptees.

Coming Soon

Before You Adopt or Foster a Child, Read This

A trauma-informed workbook for adoptive & foster parents — grounded in attachment theory, built for the real, hard questions before you say yes.

Free With Paid Sessions

Out of the Fog — 30 Daily Truths for Adoptees

Thirty short, grounding truths for adult adoptees. It's my gift to you once you book and pay for your first 1:1 session — sent straight to your inbox afterward.

See Paid Sessions

Ready to move from surviving to secure?

Whether you're healing your own story or holding space for someone else's — the first step is understanding what attachment actually needs. Let's talk about where you're starting from.

That's What They Said

Notes from the nest

"Jessie gave me language for things I'd felt my whole life but could never explain. This is the first time therapy has actually made sense."

— M., Adult Adoptee

"We stopped parenting from fear and started parenting from connection. Our foster son's meltdowns didn't disappear, but our response to them completely changed."

— The R. Family, Foster Parents

"Jessie's training gave our whole team a shared, trauma-informed vocabulary. It changed how we run intake calls."

— L., LMFT